My oldest child is getting to the age where one of the first questions we are asked by others is: “Where are you going to send your children to school?” It is usually asked out of curiosity, or for the simple pleasure of conversation, but either way, it’s a question expected to be answered.
I understand why, because I have already been asking myself that question probably since my oldest was born. It’s an important question, and one that should be carefully considered.
As a Christian, I also am asked a lot if I am going to home school, and honestly, in the society we live in, it seems like the safest and best option for my children.
However, another option I am encouraged to look into is the private Christian school. Somehow, after getting past paying large amounts of money into a school that allows the teaching of Biblical principals, this seems like the next best thing.
As most other moms, I want the absolute best for my children in every area and in every way. But, it wasn’t until recently that I realized I had been the determining factor to what I believed was best, and that, in turn, was setting my children up for less.
Recently, I was faced again with the anxiety of what decisions needed to be made for my children when we moved states into a different time zone. I left an area where the public schools were great, testing was awesome, and the opportunities seemed endless for my kids. In contrast, I was greeted in my new city where the public schools were struggling in every area possible and private Christian schools were thriving.
Naturally, I began planning to homeschool my kids. I need them safe. I need them protected. I need them educated. I need them to be given the best opportunities possible. I NEED them to be successful.
Why? I have no idea, other than to me, that was the best possible life I could give them. I mean, is it bad to want to set your children up for success early?
What I didn’t understand was that my best was determined by my opinions, preferences, experiences, and knowledge. I didn’t want other parents who paid for private schooling to think we didn’t care about our children like they did. I didn’t want to expose my children to anything too soon that could potentially hurt their innocence. I didn’t want them to experience some of the very difficult times I had experienced in schools. And, lastly, I didn’t want them to attend a school where their learning would be compromised in any way.
The Lord had to target many of these unstable perspectives and insecurities in me before I was able to understand what He was trying to tell me.
I remember I was so overcome by anxiety and fear that I started praying, “God. I am scared to be here. I want my children safe, I want them to have a good education, and I really don’t know what to do. Please help me have peace.”
His voice was so overpowering to all my fears when He responded to me by saying, “The safest place to raise your children is in My Will.”
Immediately I felt the burden I had been carrying lift off me and His perfect peace consume me. This moment was pivotal for me, because I realized I don’t have to know what is best for my children, and even more so, I don’t have to guess based on my own understanding. God is perfectly capable of using any and every avenue of education to advance His Kingdom and carry out His purposes in my children’s lives. If He wants me to home school, I will. If He wants me to send my children to public school, I will. Whatever He decides is the best route for my children, I want to be right there in partnership with Him.
I have met too many moms stressing and exhausting themselves, because they are trying to maintain their idea of what is best for their children. They are scared to make any changes because they don’t want to jeopardize their children’s future, or success, or happiness, so they live enslaved to this idea that unless they give their children everything, they will somehow be less than loving parents.
This idea of living in freedom with Jesus means giving up our own limited understanding in order to allow God’s perfect Will to penetrate our children’s lives. As parents, there is no better place to be than in partnership with what the Lord is already doing in our children’s lives. Sometimes it will take more effort to witness His movements, but when we spend time with Him, He is so faithful to share with us our part in His Master Plan.
The last thing I want is to prevent my kids from experiencing everything the Lord intends for them, and I know if I raise my kids the way I see fit, led by my unstable perspectives, instead of the way God designed, my children will always be given less than the absolute best. And as a caring and loving mom, I don’t have to know everything there is to know about parenting; I only have to know the One who knows it all and trust that He is good and faithful and will care for my children better than I ever could.
This is freedom, and it feels amazing.