“Mom, don’t think that. You know I ALWAYS trust you more than anyone. Just don’t think that, OK?”, my son confidently responded as we were driving to pick up his little sister from school. 

He and I were talking about the Tooth Fairy moments prior because he had seen a cartoon episode where the children believed in a Tooth Fairy. He started the conversation with, “Mom, how do you change into the Tooth Fairy?”

I responded, “I don’t change into the Tooth Fairy, hun. I just am.”

“I know parents are the Tooth Fairy. I saw it on the cartoon because Bluey’s dad was trying to get Bluey’s tooth. But I didn’t know how parents turn into the Tooth Fairy.”

“Well, sweetie, parents are just really good at getting their kid’s teeth at night! You’ll just have to wait and see when you lose your first tooth. But the actual Tooth Fairy isn’t real. There is no real fairy we turn into. We are just parents.”

There was a slight pause while my son pondered my response. 

I broke the silence by saying, “I’ll never lie to you, Benjamin. Mommy will always tell you the truth about life and anything you want to know. I promise. I hope you know you can always trust me to tell you the truth.”

“Mom, don’t think that. You know I ALWAYS trust you more than anyone. Just don’t think that, OK?”

I’m not sure anyone could have said anything else in that moment to make me feel better than I did hearing my son’s response.

When I first became a mom, I knew I wanted to reflect my Father in Heaven as a mother on earth. So, I denied myself every “voice of advice” in my earlier years of motherhood and pursued only His (and honestly, I still do). One of the first revelations I heard from the Holy Spirit was, “Do not lie to your children. Walk in the Truth as I am in the Truth.”

So, I have.

And that includes Santa.

I’ve talked to many Christian moms claiming they love watching their children glow and glisten with the mystery of Santa. The joy their children experience is worth decking their homes and rooms with Santa, his elves— and all things mythical. 

It wasn’t until recently, however, that I brought this major deception back to the Holy Spirit and asked Him how He felt about the Christmas traditions of Santa within the Church.

His response was powerful and worth sharing.

“Jacquelyn, I’ll never delight in watching children believe something that is apart from Me. To take joy in a lie is against the Truth for which I exist in. For I cannot exist within lies. With this, I am not pleased.”

I immediately thought of the countless parents within the Church and their children participating in the mythical idea of Santa as if it were a completely innocent way for their children to celebrate the “magic of Christmas”.

Unfortunately, we, as parents, are in a society where we are having to fight harder than ever to preserve truth. Truth about relationships, gender, history, education— even the real truth about Jesus. If our children aren’t getting the truth from us, where will they get it? 

I’ve always wondered what would happen if I went along with Santa and, when it was time to reveal that I had been lying to my children all these years, someone had already told them the truth. How would that change the way my children trusted me? If I lied to them before, would I lie to them again? Would they trust me less after they discovered I had not only lied about Santa, but continued lying for several years?

For me, this idea of lying to an innocent child— especially while they are 100% dependent on their parents and unable to discover the truth on their own — was not only a slippery slope that could lead to trust issues, but was blatantly in opposition of our Savior.

“Little children, let no one deceive you. Whoever practices righteousness is righteous, as he is righteous. Whoever makes a practice of sinning is of the devil, for the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the works of the devil. No one born of God makes a practice of sinning, for God’s seed abides in him, and he cannot keep on sinning because he has been born of God.”

1 John 3:6-9

Lying is sinning.

I understand many reading this post are probably feeling many emotions right about now. But, there is freedom in truth. And for the sake of your freedom, I will always do my very best in challenging you to live and walk in truth. 

“The truth will set you free.”

John 8:32

For me, we don’t avoid community events because a “Santa” will be present. In fact, when my son was four years old, we went to a local Christmas event downtown. My children loved seeing the Christmas lights, decorations, and we even took pictures with “Santa” and “Mrs. Clause”.

Though my children knew prior that Santa was a made-up character, they still loved seeing a jolly man passing out candy canes. Later that Christmas season, our son had come into our bedroom and said, “Mom, I know you said Santa isn’t real, but he is. You’re wrong. Santa is real.”

My husband and I giggled and I said, “No, hunny, he isn’t.”

My son confidently responded, “Yes he is! You don’t know, Mom. He is.”

I simply smiled and nodded my head as I said, “Ok, hunny”, knowing full well there would come a time where he will realize his mom was telling the truth, but I didn’t have to rush that time. He was allowed to process his thoughts on his own while I remained a consistent agent of truth. 

It’s been two years since, and my son finally understands why Santa cannot be real. Watching his mind battle between wanting to believe Santa was real and wanting to know the truth was special to my mother-heart. I never pressured him with persistent force requiring him to believe the truth. I simply presented the truth to him early on, answered every question he had about Santa with truth, and watched as he formed his own conclusion about Santa over the course of two years. 

My son trusts me. My daughter trusts me. I would never want to jeopardize being a stable, trustworthy, and safe place for them to ask questions and seek the truth. After all, until they are old enough to pursue Jesus with all their hearts, a mother and father take the role of Jesus in their homes. 

We must be willing to live as Jesus lived. In the Truth and the Light.

So, with all this being said, I want to encourage you to spend time with Jesus. You love your children, I am sure of it! You would never want to intentionally harm them. This isn’t whether or not you’re a good parent, it’s a matter of parenting in a way that honors the God you profess to have faith in. God doesn’t tolerate lying, especially when the sin directly affects children. 

“Whoever causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him if a great millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea.”

Mark 9:42

Be blessed!